It’s December 28th—the midway point of the holiday season—and I found something new wrapped up for me this year…Holiday Guilt.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve unwrapped this gift a few times before…it’s just never come in this form before. I’ve gotten it over the holidays from family for not visiting long enough or not visiting at all. Sometimes it’s come from the Salvation Army bell ringer for not dropping in enough spare change and sometimes it’s come from my waistline—after consuming one (or 10) too many cakes and cookies.
This time, though, it came from my boss—me—for not working over the holidays.
Unlike years past—where I knew I’d get paid for the time off—now it’s different. If I’m not working, I’m not getting paid. And I was reminded of that fact every time I took a sip of eggnog, watched another Christmas flick and roasted another chestnut. (Ok, I’ve never done the latter, but it sounded holiday-ish.) My guilt told me that my laptop needed to be on at all times. How else would I afford the gifts under the tree and the electric bill for all the power I’m consuming to light the bushes in our front yard?
I found it consuming…overwhelming…oppressive.
But I’m dealing with it. It’s yet another new discovery in this entrepreneurial stage of life. And with each new discovery, I’m learning that there are two sides. The good comes with the bad. The feeling of always needing to work also comes with the freedom to stop working whenever I want. It balances out. I just need to find the truth and not let guilt trap me in.
What kind of holiday guilt did you unwrap this year?